Oh Baby! Oh Baby!: Postpartum stories & Baby weight woes

Having Paxton was probably the single most amazing experience of my life. It wasn't until he was born, that I realize how amazing it was to actually have carried him. When I look at my son, I see his little hands and toes and am amazed at my divine nature at a woman to be able to have created this little being-- all of his tissues, his organs, bones, and features were grown within my womb. And that continues to amaze me every day.

Though having Paxton has changed my life, and I would go through it all over again to have him here, it is not something that was easy to get him here. My birth plan went out the window and I had to make a new plan out of left field.

After 2 months, I think I'm finally getting the hang of motherhood. One of my first hurdles was deciding what to do about my career. I'm still working on my bachelors degree, thankfully I'll be finishing that in May! but the more time I spent with Paxton the more I knew that I couldn't leave my infant with someone else that I didn't know. Ben and I have wonderful families, but are without the opportunity for someone within our families to watch Paxton full-time. So, with a lot of faith, we moved forward with faith to become a one income family. After tackling the financial aspect of having a baby-- oh baby, oh baby there is a medical bill for everything, we are moving forward with faith that we will be okay.

The other thing that I'm really working on accepting is the changes in my body. Having a baby changes everything. I'm pretty sure my body has been stretched in directions that I didn't even know existed! Thankfully some of the weight came off all on it's own after the IV fluids streamed out of my body, but overcoming the fact that my pre-baby clothes still don't fit, that my fingers are still too swollen for my wedding rings to fit, it's a huge disappointment in myself.

I am grateful for my husband who supports me and still helps me to feel beautiful, and for all the beautiful moms who just glow with joy in their families. I'm trying to learn to take everything in stride, one thing at a time.

Have tips for me? Would love to hear them! Have questions? Bring those too!

Self-Taught Chef

Dear Readers,

I have begun a new blog! It is entitled, "Self-Taught Chef", and also on blogger. You can subscribe via e-mail, or check my Facebook feeds for updated information as well.

On my new blog I will be sharing recipes, shortcuts, and other kitchen stories. If you have favorite recipes for me to try, or that you would like to share, feel free to submit them to me! ORRRRR... if you have something that you would like me to try and experiment with, I am open to suggestions as well.

Happy Reading!

http://self-taughtchef.blogspot.com/

-Kate

5 Things my Son taught me about being a parent

1. Fed is best. I had always planned on breast feeding my children. However, when I came home from the hospital with Paxton and began that process, it devastated me to realize that it wasn't something I would be able to do. I felt that I had let my son down by feeding him formula and I felt some sort of deeply rooted shame every time I went to purchase it. It took me a while to realize that fed is best. Breast fed, bottle fed, formula fed, mixture, just feed your kids. Whatever's comfortable for you, whatever works for you. If your baby is fed you are doing your job.



2. Keeping up with the Jones. I would love to tell you that my house is spotless right now, but that would be a huge lie. Frequently there's crumbs on the floor, currently Paxton's clean clothes are unfolded in his laundry basket and we've been pulling out what we need as we go, our bedroom is cluttered, and our front flower beds need weeding. But I can honestly say I'm doing the best I can. I pick up when I can. I clean up as I go. But I have accepted that if I plan to keep my house spotless and love my newborn I, personally, am gonna go insane.



3. If you weren't a morning person before, you are now. SURPRISE! It took having my son to help me become friends with the early morning hours. But now it's good!.... most days. My days start early, it's how I plan on justifying living in yoga pants for the rest of my life.



4. Your EVERYTHING hurts. Your arms hurt from holding, if you're not holding you're rocking, if you're not rocking you're folding laundry, making bottles, or fighting with them to stay still for a bath or diaper change. Your back hurts from holding, if you're not holding you're rocking, if you're not rocking your reaching for them or them for you. You're holding them still and reaching for a diaper or wipe, etc. Your neck hurts from sleeping in odd positions so that the baby will sleep and YOU can sleep. I think Ben and I both have fallen asleep in the recliner, glider, couch and the floor. Yep, the floor.



5. It's all worth it. So hang in there, Moms!

Dear Dad...

Dear You,

            I am writing this letter because I want you to know that I forgive you and also that I’m grateful for the role you played in my life. There have been times that I thought my life was empty because it didn’t have you in it. I blamed myself and a lot of other people that you weren’t there for me. I blamed myself the longest and the hardest. But I’ve come to a point where I forgive you, and where I can also say, “thank you,” for not showing up.

            Thank you for missing my soccer games, dance recitals, and my high school graduation. When I looked in the bleachers and saw my grandparents, my mom, and my little brother at my soccer game it made it even sweeter that they were there. At my dance recital I’ll never forget that my uncle Billy was there with flowers. During my high school graduation my uncle Brent and aunt Kelly were there, of course with mommy and nanny and poppy and Devin.

            Thank you for not being there while I was dating. Because you were gone I knew what was important to look for in a husband. I’m really grateful to have someone by my side that will be there for my son as he grows up to show him what a father looks like in action.

            In some ways, maybe I did miss out on things. But as I look back now, your absence made me more aware of the love I do have surrounding me. I don’t feel like I missed out. I think you did. And as I prepare to become a mom, graduate from college, and buy my first home I am so excited to cherish my loved ones being there with me for all of it. Thank you, dad, for helping me understand how important family and fr-amily (friends that are family) really are.

            I hope that whatever your life is filled with that it has brought you happiness over the years and true joy, because I have that and it’s truly priceless. As my son grows inside me each day I think about you and I wonder where you are and what you’re doing. But as I look around at the love surrounding me I realize that maybe, just this once, it was better that you weren’t there in my life.

            Thank you for helping to bring me into this world. Thank you for taking the time to be in my life when you were. Thank you mostly for leaving because I learned so much about myself on this journey. I’m sure if we passed each other you would have no trouble recognizing me—I look just like my mother. I could probably pass you without knowing, but I hope if you do see me that you don’t feel regret or guilt but that you are proud of the way I ended up, because I’m proud of the person I am. And in my mind we would wave to each other as friendly strangers and life will go on and we can both feel peace in the knowledge that we did right by each other.

            I don’t hate you, Dad. In fact, I love you. But thank you for not being there. I’m a better person because of it.

Love,

Me

Shakespeare Had it All Wrong

It's been a while! But once I catch you up on everything, I think it will make more sense as to why. In the past few months I have changed jobs, continued going to school online fulltime, found out I was pregnant after a few 1st year marriage struggles, and with the hustle of the holidays, I guess I didn't get around to writing very much. However, as Ben and I were winding down our day, a few thoughts came to me that I would like to share, you know, with the new year among us and everything. Brace yourselves the, "New year, New Me" status' are coming. And it's not to say that's a bad thing, but a very wise man asked me a few days after January 1st one year if I had thought much about my new years resolution since then. I had to admit I hadn't. It was in the back of my mind, but no matter how many encouraging stickie notes I put up to remind me not to eat that cupcake or open that bag of chips, I seemed to, by the end of January, have given way and forgotten most of my resolve. Any day is a good day for change. A new year is just a good way to mark it.

So, with that being said, getting to the subject line, ah yes, all the cringing English teachers that read this entry title. Don't worry, I am still very much a fan, however, I think he was a bit narrow sighted in one thing.

William Shakespeare-- poet, playwright, and literary genius unappreciated by his time, got many things right. However, something that I reflected on is one of the quotes he is most famous for from his writ, Hamlet.

"To be, or not to be, that is the question."

Now, if you are familiar with Hamlet, then you are familiar with the context of that quote, so I won't go into it. However, I think life isn't as much a question of being or not... you will "be" whether you enjoy your existence, and if you decide, "not to be," well, that is sad, but you still were, in that case on the have been which leaves everyone that has come to earth on the side of, "to be,". So, to be or not to be, well, you are already, "being". But what are you doing with it? That is a much more poignant question.

Not really sure my thoughts ran much deeper than that on the subject, but it seemed interesting enough to share.

To get in the New Year's spirit though, I will share a few of the things Ben and I are looking forward to in 2016...

1.) Becoming Parents: For those of you that don't know-- SURPRISE! We are expecting our first child. I am due May 30th. Before you ask, no, we still don't know what we are having, but guesses on gender are welcome.

2.) Writing: Both Ben and I have some literary ideas we are hoping to accomplish in this upcoming year. Inspired by an author I had the privilege of meeting during our beautiful Thanksgiving holiday in the OBX, I am hoping my dream of publishing SOMETHING before I die, will be 1 step closer to fruition. Ben is also working on a novel and is much further along than I am... (overachiever). In my defense I have spent the last few months growing organs.

3.) Eat more Popcorn: No seriously. Ben always gets frustrated that even though he brushes his teeth twice a day religiously, flosses, and brushes after sugar, I have better dental check-ups than him. To ease his pain, I am going to eat more popcorn this year, so he won't have to floss in the bathroom alone.

4.) Be Fearless: Oh TSwift, your songs will echo through the minds of the next generation from the mouths of their parents. Incase you didn't get the "Fearless" and Taylor Swift reference, it was a good album, go look it up on iTunes. But, on a more serious note, one of my favorite quotes is, "faith and fear cannot abide the same territory." I have pondered countless hours on what that could mean and how I could live it more fully. With a little bit more wisdom in my soul, and a lot that I could be very afraid of this year (I mean, let's be honest, I'm young, married, pretty broke, pregnant, in school, you see where this is going... oh young adult woes!) I am aspiring to face it head on the like Jean Grey.

Photo Rights: https://www.google.com/search?q=Jean+Gray+holding+back+the+dam+from+xmen&rlz=1C1CHFX_enUS487US487&biw=1093&bih=514&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwigtZaPporKAhXGrB4KHTAMDAYQ_AUIBigB#imgrc=7iTfcwv_GysggM%3A

1 day down, 365 more to go... remember the Leap Year!

5 Things Women are Hypocrites About

This came to me on my way to work last week. As I was leaving my neighborhood and being closely tailgated by a car following behind me I thought to myself, "You're not going to make me go ANY faster." However, when I am in a hurry and the car in front of me isn't going fast enough, I test to see if riding just a little closer to their bumper will move things along. As I kept driving a few other ideas came to me, so I figured I'd share. This is meant to poke fun! With all the wedding posts I thought I'd throw the boys a bone and give them some humor to read. So without further adieu, here we have my 10 things women are hypocrites about.

1.) Tailgating: I mentioned it above, but sometimes we get the thought that if we tailgate we will somehow get to move faster all the while we hate when it happens to us.

2.) Modest is Hottest: As a wife, daughter, sister, and friend I feel for this generation of women and also of men. There is so much distraction and sexuality going on in the world. Society does not make it easy to be faithful and therefore, I applaud those that continue to work on their marriages even when it isn't easy. How many of you ladies are with me in this following situation: You're out with your man and some scantily clad woman comes up into their line of vision, even if they're with another guy, switching their hips, pouting their lips and doing everything except taking their clothes off. (If your man is anything like mine he is totally oblivious anything is even happening.) You suddenly feel a rush of rage and have increased your creative capabilities 10 fold by instantly coming up with 25 ways to ruin her life. However! Before you had your man, or when he suggests going out, you reached/reach for the sexiest thing you can find.

3.) Momma: Raise your hand if this inner conflict has ever occurred: My mother was completely right... but if I tell her that I will never get to live it down.

4.) Perfume: Walks into a room and is suffocated by someone else' fragrance. 6 hours later can't smell their own perfume anymore-- solves the problem by spraying more.

5.) PMS: How many of you have made an, "Ew," comment or face about someone who gave bad customer service or rubbed you the wrong way because they must have been in a bad mood having a bad day? And then when we have a bad day and an even worse mood accompanying, PMS is always a justification? Been there so many times.

Gentlemen, what do YOU notice? It's all fair in love and war, and it's all in good fun. Life is too serious to make so much of it. Summer is winding down, and I'm getting my wheels turning for some great Fall posts for you guys. Remember you can follow me if you have your own blog, sign up to get my posts in your e-mail inbox, or like my posts on Facebook. Know somebody that can benefit from this? Share it on their wall! Always open to ideas and feedback on what you want to hear about!

That's all for now. Brace for a good week! Happy Monday Eve!

Love,
Kate


https://www.pinterest.com/pin/4503668354421286/

Part II!

Happy Sunday, everyone! I just finished my Summer semester of classes and have a short pause in education before things get crazy again at the end of the month. Ben and I are in a huge transition period in our lives and the older I get the more I learn that life never gets less busy. You truly have to seize the moment and go for the gold while the moment is presented before you. More on my opinions of that later, I'm sure. For now, here is the list of what you REALLY need in your wedding day survival kit as well as some of my tips and favorite flavored waters!

Wedding Day Survival Kit (What you REALLY need...)
Tweezers
Baby wipes-- it'll be hot under your dress... you feel me?
Hairspray
Water-- it's stressful, you might be too nervous or busy to eat, so make sure you drink. Nobody needs the bride passing out.
Extra Underwear-- I repeat... it's hot.
Bobby Pins
Granola Bar-- don't faint
Wallet
Phone
Phone Charger
Tissues-- for your eyes? No! It's hot. Blot, blot, blot.
Rings
Tylenol
Gas-X-- take two of each in the morning with a big glass of orange juice. At least if you forget my previous advice to eat and drink you'll have your headache at bay, you won't get bloated, and there will be some sugar in your system to keep you from passing out.
Tide To-Go
Deoderant-- hottttt!
Perfume
Lotion-- nerves=Swelling. Swelling=rings don't fit=panic. Fix? lotion your hands before you slip your ring on.

Flavored Waters
lemon & lime- put slices in your water and leave overnight
cucumber lemon
strawberry-- this one actually turned out to be my favorite. It was just the right amount of flavor!
lemon, honey, ginger

**remember with all of these that a little goes a long way. Let the flavors set and take a sip before adding more. I repeat-- a little goes a long way**

Don't Starve Yourself!!! Use these tips...
Carefully collected from Pinterest and personal experience, these are some of the easy peasy tips I used to avoid starving myself.

1.) Flavored Water-- I was amazed how well this worked. It curbed my appetite, kept me going to the bathroom and just tasted good. You only lose fat 2 ways-- sweat and pee. So if you're not sweatin', and not peein' you're not losing weight.

2.) AM Stretching-- It helps keep you limber and from feelings stress which keeps you from wanting to eat as much.

3.) Citrus- lemon is a natural laxative (trust me on this). It will gently cleanse you of extra weight. Squeaky clean from the inside out.

4.) Drink your weight in water-- in one day drink as much as you can. You will feel super full and be running to the bathroom quite a lot. However, it will alleviate that water weight, keep appetite down so you don't eat empty carbs, and keep stress headaches away!

5.) Multi-vitamins-- take as directed. When we are fulfilled on our vitamins it keeps specific food desires at bay. Check out this Pinterest chart for your cravings...


6.) Eat Full Fat Foods-- Sugar free, & fat free may sound ideal, but I have been perplexed by the thought lately of, if it's fat free what are they replacing the natural fat in the food with?

7.) Protein-- foods high in protein will keep you fuller longer and also help you burn fat. Nuts, poultry, lunchmeat, fish, and legumes (dark greens) are a great way to go! Planters NUT-trition energy mix is one of my favorites. I take a little bit in a baggie to work with me to munch on between breakfast and lunch.

In closing, to all of you getting married-- congratulations! It's an exciting time, so try not to let the stress get to you because it's over so fast. I hope you enjoy. Comment below for topics you want to read more about. What tips worked for you?